In some ways we are more permissive than my parents were with my brother and I. In other ways we are much more strict. I am primarily gonna focus on the latter for this entry.
Growing up, if we wanted to watch tv we could so long as no one else was using it.
If we wanted to use the phone, we could.
If we wanted to go play in the backyard, we did.
If we wanted to get on the computer, we did.
If we wanted to play Nintendo, we did.
Our kids have to ask to do all these things. Things I took for granted that I was allowed to do, they have to ask. They also have limits for how much tv they are allowed to watch. Something else that was not part of my childhood.
Part of this is because we share the living room television, don't have a home phone, & the computer chair is only chair that I can sit in and easily get up from.
But the main reason is because there are so many things that we don't want our kids exposed to!! Television has sexed up even some of the kid shows now. It's ridiculous! My daughter was watching Handy Manny back around Valentine's Day and it was about Manny asking a girl out for a date. I do not turn on preschool cartoons so that my daughter can watch them figure out how to go out on dates. That's just one example of the insanity that's on television.
The Internet... Woah! Do I really need to get into why they have to ask to get on the computer now days? Bullies, sexual predictors, porn, the list goes on and on!
You might be asking yourself, "That's great but what does that have to do with your kids not being allowed to have a cell phone and being allowed to shoot guns?" I'm getting there now.
Cell phones are no longer just for talking anymore. There's texting, games - some violent, some pornographic - there's porn - in apps as well as Internet - there's unlimited access to the Internet, there's sexing, picture messages, Facebook, music, on and on and on it goes. Don't get me wrong, I am VERY pro technology and my cell phone is practically part of my anatomy. In fact I am currently typing this post on my cell phone. However, I am an adult. I am supposedly mature enough to handle it.
Children are not. Children will realize that mom & dad can't see what they've watched or looked at or sent. Even the parents who meticulously go through their kids' phones every day can miss something. An erased text message, erased search/Internet history, etc....
Honestly how many parents are able to pull a McGee & Abbey to find out every little thing that's ever been done on the phone? Certainly not me!!
Hubby and I feel it's best to not allow access to these things until the child is old enough, and mature enough, to get a job and pay for it themselves.
On the flip side, well according to some people, we allow our kids to use firearms. Yes both can be dangerous and both can be fun when used properly & smartly. In regards to the both are dangerous, I say this: Hand a kid a cell phone and they disappear into their room or outside and you have no control over what they are doing. Even if they are sitting in front of you, chances are you don't know what they're doing on it! However, when I hand my child a firearm I am RIGHT THERE!!! Typically my dad is right there as well. We go over gun safety rules before they ever touch the firearm. Each and every time. They started out with a BB gun, graduated from that to a pellet gun, to an air soft gun (all of which gets treated exactly the same as a "real" gun would!!!), and from their they move up to "real" guns.
So far only M has moved up to "real" guns. And that was only last summer when he turned 13.
We never ever turn the kids loose with a firearm (regardless of the power behind it). My dad taught my brother, my self, M, & S how to shoot. He was always right there when my brother and I shot, until we got to the point where he knew we knew what to do. We shot more often than my kids do. We were turned loose, so to speak, at an age before I'll be willing to turn our kids loose.
When M first shot "real" guns he learned from people who were experienced. My dad, who has been shooting basically forever, was there. As was 4 current or former corrections officers (one of whom is a firearms instructor for the military). M was never alone with a firearm. One or more of us were right there with him.
Tell me, what child with a cell phone has that level of supervision and instruction??
1 comments:
Having been one of the 2 people who brought you up; You and your brother were limited in the amount of TV you watched, it just wasn't voiced. You had a while in the morning, then you played in your rooms, the family room or out back. There were no cell phones, computer-type stuff didn't come into the house til you were a little older and the internet not until you were both over 15. We had Atari Pong. Technology wasn't around as it is today. There were TV game console games and our first 2 computers could only be used for games and learning tools and communication by paper. Once we did get online, it was limited also. We had dial up and one phone. You don't realize how much we limited some things because of the way the household worked, it wasn't specifically spelled out, it just was. As for the guns, you weren't exactly 'let loose' with them. The only place to shoot was at the Farm with Dad, Grandpa, Uncle. Again, limited but also covered by opportunity not being there as often.
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